I can’t get enough of comments, posts and blogs that attempt to share with women what men think about sex and relationships. All the major women’s magazines have a male columnist to answer questions from female readers once a month. I can still remember the Ask Jake column in Glamour when I was a teenager, and I always took his word as gospel.
Well, here at Hooking Up Smart we’re swimming in great insights from men. The other day I noticed the arrival of Andrew, a new commenter who linked to his blog. I clicked through, as I always do to commenter blogs, and found The Rules Revisited. Here’s his mission:
I’ve dated countless women and it has always amazed me how little they know about men. If nothing else, this blog is an outlet for voicing my astonishment at the typical female’s ignorance of the male mindset. At most, it is a reliable source of information for women who want to improve their chances with the opposite sex.
It’s brand new, and he’s only got a dozen posts so far, but they’re excellent. You could do a lot worse than read them all during a break today.
Here’s a taste: Why Women Don’t Know What Men Want
“As human beings, we always try to project our own perceptions on those around us…We do this because it is efficient, even if at times it is inaccurate…
This same phenomenon explains why men and women are so clueless about one another and what the other wants. Because Western society has championed the idea that the sexes are equal (which I don’t deny), we have also started to assume that they are the same (which I very strongly do). At least, we have allowed ourselves to get used to this idea enough that when we consider what is attractive to the opposite sex, we are far less prone to interrupt our default course of action. In other words, we are far less likely to project our own ideas of attractiveness onto the opposite sex. To whatever degree we allow (or are allowed) to make this projection, we will believe that what is attractive to us must also be attractive to them. And this is where things get all fucked up.
Speaking for myself, the second list is very definitely what I used to believe men want, especially the “hard to get” part.
So what does Andrew think is really true?
“Women actually like…
Men that are “hard to get”
Men who drink liquor straight
Men with status
Men actually like…
Physically attractive women
Women that have no hair on their bodies
See what he did there? I didn’t see that coming! I think he’s totally right about what [most] women want! (I know one woman who wrote off a guy when he ordered an appletini on their first date. I’m sorry, but it’s true.)
Seriously, this guy is money. Get on over there. Welcome to the Blogroll, Andrew!